Update! Yes, finally. This will probably be the last post in which I post World Cup pictures, because there are friendles on telly now! Which means I can obsess over and madly picspam those now.
Anyway. Up, up, and away!
... to ze peektures. I couldn't be bothered to classify them alphabetically, by the way. Not like that bothers most people like it bothers me.
FIBO Steel Photoshoot/Ad Campaign
Featuring Dida and Buffon!
Buffon: Yo, my meticulously plucked eyebrows and obviously digitally-enhanced eyes are better than you!
Dida: Total X-Men pwnage!
Oh man, hotness.
... this is for another ad campaign, and it's a lot gayer. Can you tell?
Dida: Eat it, I says!
Buffon: RAWR, NO!
Buffon: But I'mma eat yer shoulderrr!
Buffon: Dude, nice boobs ya got thurr.
Buffon: You gotta flaunt it!
Dida: This is getting a bit weird, man.
Coming up next, When Frolicking Goes Too Far. Please stay tuned.
-Insert commercial break for Special K cereal-
Philip Lahm vs Owen Hargreaves Photoshoot (A.K.A. best photoshoot EVAR)
... and wild!
And dirtaaay! Hells yes.
This photo is so drool-worthy that I'm not even going to bother thinking of a caption.
Lahm: -To Hargreaves- Dude, you jealous of the ball yet? -Fondles ball-
(The lighting in the second picture = GUH.)
Hargreaves: oO' Dude, hell no.
GAH, little Lahmi's cuteness kills me.
... yeah, 'wtf' is right.
Beckham: -Thinking- What's a dummy? Normally they call me 'idiot'.
Gerrard: -To Ferdinand- Man, you so should've went to Frankie's party last night. We had fruit punch and took turns putting our hands down each others' pants.
Ferdinand: Wait, what?!
Lampard: You idiot! I didn't invite him for a reason, you know.
The English boys are all emofied and Scolari's just dashing across like, "YEY YEY YEY YEY!" Cracks me up everytime.
Lampard: Yo, what are you looking at?
Gerrard: -Stares at chest- Uhhh... nothin'.
Presenting Brat OTP: Bastian Schweinsteiger/Lukas Podolski (A.K.A. Schweinski)
Schweini says, "Wuddup, yo?"
Poldi retaliates with, "You want my shirt, bitch?!"
(What an engaging conversation! That... barely makes any sense.)
... well, there's no confusion as to who's on top.
Schweini: I'm watching youuu!
Poldi: You da man!
Poldi: Let me practice my qi gong on you.
Now that's what I call a celebration.
They're connected at the crotch and... arse...!
Observe how Poldi's trying to push the other dude away but he's clutching onto Schweini.
Schweini's thinking, "Baby, you know how to push my buttons. Oh hells yesss."
(Now, if you ignore my stupid caption, this is a really cute photo.)
For the high-five, yo.
I'm pretty sure Poldi's going to open a school for ROFLdom soon.
Awww, look at the bliss!
One of them's got to be a whore.
And it's Poldi, yo!
Do I smell angry sex?!
"Hold me tight, and hold me klose!"
Kahn: 'Sup, y'all. I'm a hip old man.
Poldi: -Thinking- I'll show you hip...s!
He even goes after coaches.
An omen of major slashy proportions?
Poldi: Is it hot out here or is it just you?
Odonkor: Ohmigawd, like now you got me all wet!
Awww. I remember seeing this on telly and just going, well, "Awww."
Protective!Poldi. Taking a dip on the dominant end, eh?!
Schweini goes 'grrr', but good-naturedly, because who doesn't love a boy-whore?
And Here's Some Rooney/Ronaldo Mini-Picspamming (and I do mean mini)
Look at them children.
Ronaldo looks like he's about to burst into tears and Rooney's vaguely gorilla-esque.
I nearly choked on my altoid when I saw this picture. Fricking priceless, I tells ya.
Real Madrid (all the pretty boys and no work ethic at all, tsk tsk)
Beckham: Showers after the match?
Casillas: Dude, it says 'Made in China'!
Zizou: Whoa, it does! Heheheh...
Well, looks like they disagreed on who blinked first.
Figo: You gotta cool down, baby!
Figo's Instruction Manual on Pacifying a Staring Contest Maybe-Loser Beckham:
Step I. Turn on the headlights.
Somebody partied too late last night.
Yey, Brazilian lovin'! They may not be hot, but it's still cute.
Españaaa! (Yey, I got that little squiggly thing above the N!)
... even though Raul is a bit of a whore.
Nothin' like them adorkable Spanish boys.
Casillas: Sooo... what are you doin' tonight, sugah?
I think I might have posted this picture already at my old Xanga, but it's just so cute in a dorky way. And bulging calf muscles, yo!
Torres: It's okay, darling! If you wait in line patiently, you'll get your some famous Torres Lovin' eventually.
Torres: -To ball- I'll take care of ya, baby.
Torres: Oh shit, I forgot to bring the condoms!
Now, if only the photographer got a shot to the right, we'd see the rest of the Spanish team with glasses of red wine and monocles scrutinizing Torres' backside like a good painting.
pornographic sweet nothings into Iker's ear-
Joaquin: Nice ass, boy.
Referee: Sir, please leave the penalty area.
I love how their arms make a heart shape. <333
Hahaha, ftw?! Well, at least Cesc's not drooling.
Torres: DUDE, it's FLOATING.
Torres: ... o_O
Casillas: Run, Santi!
Casillas: OOOOOOOO SOLE MIOOOOOOOOO!
Torres: Sooo... I heard you're single.
They always grab the pretty ones. -Shakes head-
I see this picture and think 'OMGSOCCERPORN'.
Dude: It's your fault!
Torres: No, it's your fault!
Dude: Your fault!
Torres: Your fault!
Dude: My fault!
Torres: My fault!
Dude: ... hahaha!
Torres: ... I want my mommy!
And yey, I'm finally done.